Thursday, December 20

Chugga Chugga Choo

The Walker family, minus Avey, went on the Polar Express in Grapevine with my cousins and aunt and uncle. The girls enjoyed it. Not sure I would do it again, but glad we went. 

They wore their PJs of course. 
And Blake threw on a fur sweater for a touch of class. :)

It almost felt like a big boat. Bobbing and swaying down the track.

Clara Kate, the Culley's newest addition was so cute and happy even though it was way past her bedtime. Zach and I love her tiny mouth.

Alli, Brendan, Aidan, Rob. 

OMG. I'm actually in a picture.

Some jerk face told me my speed light was too bright and was all offended. So this was the last picture I got.

After the train, Blake and Kylie *thought* they would like a nice pony ride. I mean, who doesn't love a good lap around the old pony ride contraption? Turns out, Blake and Kylie have no future as veterinarians, cowgirls, or horse trainers. They were scared. Shocking. It started out ok, but as soon as Blake's horse got a little wobbly, she started to freak out, and when Blake freaks out, Kylie starts to freak out. So before they even went around half of the loop, we were scooping them off the ponies and on our merry way. I'm proud of them for trying.

 And one last little pic of Blake with her bell that Santa gave her on the train.

Dr. M and the Latest on Blake

When there is a problem or a decision to be made, I am full steam ahead. Way more than the average bear. It drives my husband crazy sometimes, but I attribute many of my best life experiences and much of my success in business to this nutty quality of mine. I don't like to think things through very long. Call it going with your gut, trusting your instincts, whatever. I do it. I love it. It's my thing. I have a hard time relating to those who ponder and wonder and think until they're blue and think it over some more, it's just not my style. So why am I even talking about this? As it relates to Blake, the minute I thought she had ADD, I was on the phone making a doctor appointment. The minute he referred us to a diagnostician, I was on the phone. The minute she referred us to OT, ST and a psychiatrist, I was on the phone. Luckily our psychiatrist was easy to get into. He works weekends and was able to fit us in on a Sunday.

I didn't know what to expect. I've never been to a psychiatrist. The closest I've ever been to an appointment like that was when I went to a general doctor about anxiety and panic attacks. And interestingly enough, I was having a panic attack about talking to a doctor about panic attacks. Ha! I was a mess. Apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Sorry Blakey!

So, Dr. M was wonderful. He evaluated Blake for about ten minutes while we filled out paperwork in a very 80s waiting room. I was happy to hear that he thought Blake was as normal as can be. However, that is why the parent portion of the appointment is like two hours long, Blake can make a great first impression, but we have all the history and details that helped lead him to a treatment plan for her.

We discussed our family history, which is filled with addiction and anxiety. We discussed Blake's characteristics, struggles, concerns. He started her on a very low dose of an anti depressant/anti anxiety med. One of our main issues was her mood. I just feel like her quality of life was kind of bad, she was always so stressed, so easily frustrated, so easily upset, so so so so so quick to cry. I don't love that she is on medication, but I am certainly not opposed to trying something that could make my child's life much more enjoyable and manageable.

She has only been on it for a couple of weeks, and she only takes it every other day. I have definitely seen an improvement. She is still totally herself and still has mood swings, but they are way less frequent and I think it will only continue to improve as she gets used to the medicine. She hasn't had a single side effect and nothing negative has come from it up to this point.

We go back to the doctor in about a month to see how it's going. We have GOT to do something about her ADD. It's out of control. She can barely function in her dance class, so I can only imagine how oblivious she must be in a full day of school. Doctors don't like to medicate for ADD until kids are 6, there is research showing that ADD meds aren't very effective until the age of 6, so parents will think they aren't working, take their kids off the meds and then run into even bigger problems when the kid is struggling at a later age.  Again, I would love for the problem to just go away, for her to "grow out of it" but as she is getting older, although some aspects are getting much better (anxiety), other problems are becoming worse in comparison with her peers (ability to attend).

One irritating part of this journey, is that there seems to be a wait list every where I turn. We are currently on a wait list for OT and ST, and I am very ready to get her going with those therapies. Hopefully soon! At least we have gotten started with the psychiatrist and I am already seeing a happier Blake. Thank God for modern medicine!

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